The side we’ve come to know is the one whose instructions we have been letting.
Giving the framework for the words that we affirm it with.
The art that connects the rain.
The shaking that we lean on.
And the smallness that grips lonely.
Not from some echoing moment still burning inside.
Nor from the influence of a funny kind of color.
Or from a plot twist.
But from an entire world walking behind the label that has felt enough.
For the journey that rose up to meet us.
For the mistakes that remain public.
For all the right, that still didn’t work in the garden.
For the meaning built to fill in missing meanings.
Because taking care of us has been what we have been letting.
But then, that stuff is indeed ours.
In the form of the storms that have come, some without reason.
As the weeds that have choked out the flowers.
As what has been that cannot be undone.
And the love me nots that slowly climbed on board.
But just because things remain, it doesn’t mean that they have to stay as what we have been letting.
That we can’t remember that we are here despite the weight over there.
That safety can’t be sung as loud as fumbled melodies.
And that we are not homes to be moved under the label of words but homes where words can and are moved around in.
Because on the other side of what we have been letting is still us.
The us not prepared for thorns or weeds but figured out surviving anyways.
The us drifting through the fear and sorrow in the soil and showing up to hug the versions hurting there.
The us, not sure about anything, but holding space to grieve and be happy within the same step.
Because what we have been letting isn’t here to be escaped but for us to change how we go through it.
To sign our name to experiences and decide for ourselves what we are going to do with them.
To upgrade the flow of feelings, without being stuck in the heartache of having them.
To let love be the bridge for the artwork pooled in what doesn’t look good.
And to agree to missing the sun but never us.
Moments are the place holders of where we have been, but what comes after is our collaboration with the strong message of fear to figure out where love needs to land.
This little flower nurtures a garden, not because it’s easy to grow, but because what we have been letting has already mulched the other side.
Have the best day, POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
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