There’s a Dragon #249

Throughout the history of literature, there has been no better villains in both spoken and written tales than the dragons who were powerful enough to wreak havoc in the lives of all living things and to prevent the completion of heroic journeys. Every single one of them has held the commonality of being typecast as the bad guys in those narratives regardless of their particular looks and skills. Of course, over time those stories evolved the concept that a hero would defeat the dragon, rescue the maiden, free the village or retrieve the sword or jewel that would end the suffering for everyone involved because the need for hope has been around as long as we have. Eventually though, a few epic tales transformed or changed to incorporate the idea that some dragons can be utilized to help us and really aren’t always the villains in a story. So, what about the different kinds of dragons that can be located in our lives that makes us the authentic characters in our own epic tales? Are they always the evil doers that hold us back and compel us to regret our lives while wishing we were in someone else’s story or could some of them have a place in why we are so very possible? Allow me to introduce to you one of my dragons that became my confident and helped me to feel safe enough every time I needed to hide behind it. It would be easy for me to tell you that I discovered it as a result of Ryan’s addiction, like that foil one, but the real truth is that I know it was already hanging around, periodically showing its teeth and claws, long before any of that specific mess occurred. I guess you could say that it helped me to believe that I was powerful every time I suffered but ultimately its fierce voice made it difficult for me to even hear myself let alone anyone else. I’ve come to realize that its once necessary protection has been feeding the hell within me as well as preventing me from writing on the pages of a story of love for myself particularly in the moments where I was falling which is exactly when I needed to keep in touch the most. It did serve a purpose for some time, but transformation doesn’t occur if we don’t see beyond what we are used to like how dragons were said to be invincible and would always win until someone decided to change those narratives with the help of sometime warriors and hope. That companion of mine is simply known as anger, but its armor is a complicated series of scales resulting from a vast emotion filled lifetime so perhaps my appearance of being stoic is really the visual of my inside dragon on the outside protecting me just as my smile has at other times. I hate that “flipping out” has been a response of mine even if it felt so justified but then isn’t that what the purpose of anger or even substance use is as a specific dragon that we utilize in order to keep our messes and our feelings, that vulnerability, hidden behind a door? In other words, this is one of the hardest cliff-hanging lessons that I have had to turn and perceive of but I’m going through with me, and that means all of the authentic person that I am not just the comfortable and convenient parts that I want. There’s a dragon within you as well and perhaps even a few of them but it’s time to feel because you are on your heroic journey and while there will be painful darkness as well as falling along the way, you have always been the best person to write your story so don’t let any villains or companions prevent you from keeping in touch with yourself. Use them to step towards you. After all, hope like light is always possible because we are, and when it comes to finding strength, it still isn’t just about the flowers. There’s a dragon here, in fact they can be located everywhere on any trail, but you can still have the best day POSSIBLE for you based upon what you say to yourself. I hope those words can be found on the pages in a story of love for yourself. Love Always, Heavell