The most fearful and courageous place that we will ever be is on the inside of ourselves; the beholder of all of our moments. It is also the position where we can lose ourselves if we only say and listen to the things that hurt. When we limit our view, we breathe that restriction into our hearts; feeding the hell. The same can also be said if we try to exclude the pain by denying or hiding it; or through the use of substances. When we eliminate a feeling, we push the others into the shadows; making them hard to be perceived of or even remembered. Are you sure that you don’t want to find the understanding of you in that uncomfortable place? Are you sure you don’t want to turn around and see that the beauty of fear can be found in an unfamiliar way? Oh hell, the real truth is that no matter what you perceive of, there is so much more that hasn’t been recognized that created it. It takes courage to fall because many unseen moments came together before it happened; its never been an easy thing to do to a sometime warrior. Fear, itself, has a part in our standing or stepping through the recognition that we have been in a place for far too long. What you breathe in and say to yourself, as well as the perception of it, then has the ability to lift up or to destroy you; always occurring in your matter of time. Today is here and yesterday is gone but tomorrow holds the hope that you will get comfortably uncomfortable with being a perfectly, irritatingly, messy person; or so very heavell. Oh hell, we all are; whether an addict or not.
Wherever we go, we take all of our moments with us; especially the ones that we didn’t hope for or want. So what? They only matter if we tell ourselves that the strength of those things are more powerful than we are as a whole. Oh hell, what if in this perfect moment you were to understand that you, on the inside, are who and what you are working with; not what is on the outside of you? Does that scare you to know that? You should feel that fear, knowing that there are different and similar falls ahead, while also experiencing courage for the very same reason. Have and hold each encounter, whether loved or hated, as a part of the creation of the beauty that belongs solely to you. This is a journey in a life where you can see and do this in unfamiliar ways; today or perhaps tomorrow. Even the view of yesterday, and how it has affected you, can be changed by seeing beyond what has just been in front of you. Since this is an inside existence, what can you say to remind yourself that you are both fallen and a sometime warrior? You didn’t think you could be victorious without falling in some way did you; by words and or actions? Oh hell, this is me and this is you being just alike on the outside and yet different on the inside. It’s all right to take your matter of time. To find the beauty though, you actually have to feel all of your parts and moments; to deal. If you don’t, it will just be another green truth in a life that is so very heavell. Oh hell, just choose the all of you and go through.
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