In epic tales the possible destruction of a character, a place or a thing along with the tension that comes from the fear of that failure occurring, creates the “on the edge” feelings that encourage us to jump, breathe in or even scream right along with those personas as if it were happening to us. In fact, the bigger the chance of destruction the stronger our hope is that a win will materialize regardless of whatever invincible mystical creatures have to be battled or the moments where those individuals just want to turn the pages to easily move forth on their journeys. Great storytelling is the art of using words to transport us not just into other lives and places but into ourselves where there are pieces of us that actually make those characters so enduring. In other words, we connect with the fear, hope, anger, doubt, celebration and grief that those individuals go through, and unlike in our actual lives, those tales allow us to experience “flipping out” moments without having to live them. Why is it so much easier to understand, accept and be supportive of those sentiments when they occur in a book or a movie or a song but not when they are within us? Is it the inclusion of mythical creatures or a hero status or a poignant tune that makes it all right for those things to be expressed? Or is it that those feelings are allowable as long as they are not being used to expose who we are on the inside especially what makes us feel vulnerable? Some time ago I wrote about a young man named Trevor Garroutte who wrote the book “Stomping in Puddles” which is the story of his losing and finding his way when the plot twists in his life enfolded things he never imagined would be located along his trail. As a former army infantry medic, cancer survivor and homeless person, he is what we often envision a hero in an epic tale would embody and yet the things that went right didn’t mean or guarantee that he would never find himself in the weeds or up against challenges that would push him close to self-destruction. Trevor’s book contains only a section of his life’s journey but in it he’s candid about how he felt every step of the way through, over the land and within himself. There are no mystical creatures in his story and he certainly didn’t feel like a hero nor did he know exactly where he was going but in the end he found where he needed to be which was to show up in all the ways that he was living his life especially in the moments that he didn’t want and hurt. In the art of storytelling or in living a so very heavell life, the particulars about each of us matter and we get to decide how they will be portrayed as well as what their value is as they breathe within us and we can also change any or all of it as our field of view expands to see, feel and understand more. Take care with your words because if you only look one way at them, what you say about yourself will never be all that you really are or are capable of. Take care with your steps because what works for someone else may not be the best series of movements for you but go ahead and try it as a part of discovering what is your way. Take care of your heart because it’s the one place that you will always be home in no matter what location you find yourself in or who surrounds you on your circle. A little bit at a time take care of you because any type of dragon can be defeated but it won’t always be in the ways you have envisioned or want it to be. After all, you never imagined yourself here now did you? Have the best day POSSIBLE for you in this section of your life’s journey. Who knows, maybe today is the day that you will write a plot twist as a reminder for the real hero in your narrative that it is always all right to not always be all right, that you can be found and lost in every moment and that we walk hand in hand with fear as well as courage but it’s the direction that we look through that determines which one we feel so move your view if you need to. Oh hell, in some parts of your story boxes of tissues have been for your tears of pain but on the next page or in the next chapter, you are strong enough to change those things from the “f” moments whose outer-layer had seemed so invincible in the yesterdays into what you laugh about tomorrow. Can you visualize my giggling each time I go to pick up a foil dragon to cover my leftovers with as I feel Ryan’s bear hug around my heart? Yeah I never thought it was possible either but then I also didn’t realize that I was powerful enough to add yet another emotional definition to a word that had appeared to be completely defined until a different truth came into my view. Even if you are showing up late, take care of and be kind to the writer of your epic tale now. Love Always, Heavell
The definition of an epic tale has been established as a literary work about a person or group performing heroic deeds while on a long and amazing adventure or otherwise intense story. That kind of narrative usually involves the rescuing or the saving or the defending of someone or some place against some type of enemy. They can be an account of an actual journey or revolve around imaginary creatures or have a combination of real and false details in order to make the tale feel more interesting. Today, stories like that are most often about an authentic and ordinary person who, through a series of movements, discovers what he or she is really capable of despite the fear and the pain along that extended journey or the presence of mystical creatures that are not always found in the form of fire-breathing dragons. Of course, it is always easier to cheer for someone who appears to be an unassuming hero to begin with then it is to show up for us in our own narratives where our sometime warriors often find themselves stuck in the weeds “of our own making” Despite the different details though, all stories are about the process of becoming someone that an individual didn’t necessarily imagine he or she would become. In other words, you didn’t envision yourself here to begin with so today is a good day to make way for being curious about, to locate, who you want to be as you turn a little bit at a time what has been into the plot twists or superpowers of your tomorrows. To make way for a win, then, you have to look at the possibilities of what can help you and what has or will prevent you from moving forward. After all, these are our individual real-life intense stories and since we can’t just pass the pages that we don’t want or skip the scenes that hurt, make way for the art of living in heavell by recognizing that change is a series of movements, a whole is never ever just defined by a part and that courage walks hand in hand with fear because we are always capable of both but it’s the view that we look at that determines what we breathe in. Have the best day POSSIBLE for you as you make way for so much more than you have imagined. Love Always, Heavell
To imagine ourselves beyond where we find ourselves, we have to envision transforming the parts within ourselves that need to be rather than just picturing ourselves in a new location. To move, though, requires us to change without the guarantee that everything will be all right in the new position or pain free along the way and the feeling of fear that we get when thinking about doing so, is like what an authentic character in an epic tale experience’s as he or she attempts to sneak past one of those fire-breathing dragons while it looks directly at that persona. Our hope is that turning ourselves will simply occur by taking a step or two towards what we want but unfortunately, we often fail at change because the real truth is that each spot on our trails is the results of a series of movements rather than from a single moment or action and the same is needed in order to get to a new place. Today we would like to share the words of author Susan David on why “change is a process rather than an event” After all, we may believe we are “stuck” in our weeds but since turning is a precise procedure on the inside, we have to locate what is achievable with the details that we ourselves are carrying. As always have the best day POSSIBLE for you as you imagine turning one small thing a little bit at a time to find what works for you. Love Always, Heavell
When life isn’t living up to our expectations, it’s often tempting to think in terms of dramatic changes. We fantasize about quitting our job and heading off to a mountain ashram.
We are embarrassed by our junk food diet and muse about going vegan. We consider what it might be like to leave our partners and rebuild our identities in far away places.
Usually these massive changes appear so daunting that we do nothing and remain stuck and dissatisfied. In the instances where we do follow the impulse to turn our world on its head, we often find the reality of our new situation doesn’t live up to our imaginings. Our problems are not all instantly solved.
The truth is that nature favors evolution, not revolution. Single-celled organisms slowly morph and adapt, finally creating complex plants and animals. Continents plod across oceans, giving shape to our world. So it is with our own lives.
Change is a process, not an event. Rather than break from our past with a single decision, it is often more effective to make small, subtle changes that steer us in the direction of our values. This insight is the basis of what I call the tiny tweaks principle.
Thinking small has real advantages. The cost of failure is comparatively low. When we realize that we’ve got little to lose, we feel less pressure and more confidence. And the focus on modest, achievable goals provides tangible markers on the road to success. But what does this look like when applied to your everyday habits?
Here are four different tactics you can use to make tiny tweaks that add up to big change:
1. The No-Brainer: Switch up your environment so that when you’re hungry, tired, stressed, or rushed, the choice most aligned with your values is also the easiest. If you’re trying to shave off a few pounds, then set yourself up for success by stocking your shelves with fresh fruit rather than cookies. Now your only choice for a midnight snack is one you won’t regret in the morning.
2. The Piggyback: Add a new behavior onto an existing habit. To continue with the weight loss example, this might mean turning your routine walk with your dog into a routine jog, or doing some jumping jacks when you tune into the nightly news.
3. The Pre-commitment: Anticipate obstacles and prepare for them with “if-then” strategies. If my partner makes a doughnut run, then I’ll treat myself to the juicy pear I’ve already got stored in the break room fridge. If I’m tempted to sleep through my morning workout, then I’ll remind myself how much better I’ll feel for having done it.
4. The Obstacle Course: Offset a positive vision with thoughts of potential challenges. In one study, researchers advised half of the participants in a weight loss program to envision themselves with new svelte figures and the other half to imagine situations where they’d be tempted to cheat on their diet. A year on, the second group had shed more weight. Optimism is important, but it’s most effective when paired with realism.
Any sea captain will tell you that if you steer a ship just a few degrees this way or that, you completely alter its trajectory. Over the course of a long journey, it may end up hundreds of miles from where it would have without that slight adjustment.
Think of your life the same way. Turn too sharply and you might capsize, but a slow gentle change will get you where you want to be.
Wishing you well,
Susan
Every person, place and thing have a story that contains the details of the process that each have gone through on their journey. In other words, theories, hopes, creativity, goals, and imagination can be found in all the ways that we and objects exist in the world. In a novel, the author uses creativity to generate and manipulate the experiences of the often-made-up characters while maintaining a sense of relatable authentic-ness by giving them the desire to overcome or achieve something and us the wish that they will. In the story of a field, the plants have requirements in order to grow there but if the prickles that affect them are too much, then the objective won’t occur until the vegetation adapts or the environment changes into something more hospitable either way though there is always the hope that everything will just be what it needs to be. In the tale of a smile, a limited field of view believes that a grin means that someone is happy even though there has always been an underlying chance of a plot twist where that specific facial feature is actually the innovative cover -up for pain but then it’s hard to perceive that an established belief has to evolve as the particulars of existing become more visible to us. Even music and art have their components or mediums that can be arranged, then rearranged and then repositioned again to create different results depending on the artists perspectives or the place that they are at when their feelings came to life. All of those things exist not because of the promise or guarantee of a perfectly finished product, or an easy and loveable trail surrounded by only flowers or words that say and are heard exactly as they are hoped to be but because through trial and error, its imaginable to find what is possible by expanding theories to work better with the different settings that occur in our lives especially the ones found on the inside of each of us. During Ryan’s three-week battle for his life, there were some individuals who “flipped out” over my steps in that one particular process based on their belief of how things should have been handled. For them there was real truth in their goals along with their hope, but we also have to be aware that sometimes the prickles are too much in the space that they are growing in, or certain actions are not the right movements to get us to where we want to be even if they work for someone else or there is a theory that says they are the right ones for everyone. As I pass this way again, I am able to see the moments in which my behaviors in the yesterdays would have implied to Ryan that he had not only failed by falling into the weeds to begin with but by also going down into them again and again. Of course, it’s easy to feel that way when we are caught in the midst of breathing in fear and pain, but it also feeds the hell by pushing the possibility and the hope from the light into the shadows for that person when those things were already on the edge for that individual. I understand and feel that now that I have also experienced a similar and yet different circumstance in which I was the person living it while others were the observers on the sideline. I regret that both Ryan and I hadn’t realized sooner that the series of movements that he kept trying to follow through with for years were not the ones that were ever going to help himself imagine what he would look like in a place beyond his substance use. So, what are you strong, powerful and loud enough to do today for you regardless of what you have done again and again on all of the previous days? A little bit at a time, imagine yourself beyond your substance abuse. A little bit at a time step in a different direction while feeling your way to discovering some things that work and others that don’t not that you can’t. A little bit at a time seek help until you find the one that will sit with you while you get all right with all that you are. Most of all recognize that as a work of art you are on an epic journey of trial and error where love and hate are both found in the form of dragons, prickles can hurt you as well as help you reach the light, and weeds are a part of the process leading to the beauty of the person that you are going through all of this with, but you have to look both ways. Have the best day POSSIBLE for you because a little bit at a time you are so very POSSIBLE. Love Always, Heavell
Thanks to the curiosity of some researchers at Brigham and Women’s Hospital, they are gaining new insight into addiction remission after mapping the occurrence of it happening in substance users who suffered a stroke. The technique known as lesion network mapping led to entire brain circuits rather than it being in specific brain regions pointing to new targets for treatment. They found a specific brain circuit for nicotine and another similar one for alcoholism suggesting a potentially therapeutic, targetable neural pathway for addiction in general, rather than addiction to a specific substance. “Now that our study has identified a target-a specific human brain circuit-we hope to test whether targeted neuromodulation to this brain circuit provides sustainable symptom relief to our patients. We have hope that we can make significant strides towards helping patients with substance use disorders”.
Author Juho Joutsa, Brain lesions disrupting addiction map to a common human brain circuit. Published in Nature Medicine https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-022-01834-y
A little bit at a time and with a little bit of hope, we are imagining so much more…
To express our emotions and our views in an artistic manner, we must picture what our feelings look like on the outside of ourselves and show how we see people, places and things in creative ways. To discover knowledge, we must first envision a theory and then go through the steps that will lead to locating the truth of what’s there. To experience change in both our emotional responses to life and our logic of who we believe we are, we have to imagine bringing ourselves to a different position before we know what it’s actually like to be in that place. Each of those desires, as well as so many other things, rely upon the use of imagination as a part of the series of movements that guides us to what’s possible but not always to what we hope we will find. In today’s picture, the designer of it has placed three inanimate objects where they are together but not together on a board. Visually the space between the items makes their separation obvious and their particular appearances is also another way to see how they are not together but since they are resting in the same location, what would be the reason for them being there? If those things were the visualization of the artist’s feelings, which ones do you imagine they represent? What, then, about that piece of wood that is an obscure part of their togetherness? Would placing them in different positions on that board change what each is capable of? Or what if one or all of those pieces were no longer beneficial in their established role, could they then be used in an unexpected manner? Now turn around and visualize as well as feel some of the weight of the world that you, yourself, are keeping together but not together within you. What if you were to rearrange the positions of your things from front to back or into the shadows from the light? Would what you see and feel then change or remain as they have been established? Can you imagine each being used to bring you to a place other than the one that you have become familiar and comfortable with? One of the most painful and challenging parts of losing Ryan has been in learning to take my intense feelings and repurpose or transform them rather than just move them around or close the door on the mess as had been established by me in the yesterdays. As a work of art in progress, I am also discovering the beauty of those out of the blue wins when my kind of life, a so very heavell one, doesn’t always hold what I hope for, or it throws me off of an emotional cliff into the place where my dragons are not in the form of mystical creatures but are just as scary for me. Today is a good moment for you to take what has been yours to carry and use all or some of it to be loud in expressing yourself in ways that you haven’t imagined were possible because of what has been together but not together in your theories. After all, you never pictured yourself here and yet in this place you are so take the chance to envision, step by step, what you will look like after you leave this particular part of your journey in your matter of time. If you need a reminder on how to imagine more of something, think about how even in epic tales, boxes of tissues have been established to be used for the moments that individuals cry from pain but in a different truth they are just as important when tears stream out of our eyes because we are laughing until our stomachs hurt about those dreaded “f” moments that no longer live in our messes. Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
Thank you, Mom, for always sharing your love of art with us and for teaching us to pay attention to the details because the whole will be all right if the particulars are together, but the entity can’t be what we hope for if the parts are not together even when they are located on the same board or picture or trail or page or whatever.
There are two places on the inside where our particulars provide us with the critique of who we believe we are through what we think and what we feel. In a sense we move back and forth between two distinct poles trying to find a balance with the facts of our lives and our emotions that have the ability to turn an inanimate object into something that we cry about. Even in epic tales, our connection to the fictious characters is in part because they give a voice to the clash that we experience as they go through their trials and tribulations with emotions and logic that are often in conflict. But even though we are linked to those personas whose enduring qualities are the ability to appear as we do, there is something that separates us that is not the easily seen differences of made-up lives versus real ones. In other words, what do those roles use as a tool when they are turning around between the two points of truth and passion in order to continue on against the odds? Perhaps you are thinking that it’s their goal that motivates them? Or maybe you feel that their hope is the key? Both of those are important parts of all journeys, but the answer is actually an obscure thing that is also found in all music, the story of a field, the chaos behind a door, a forest, works of art and so much more. It has the ability to appear in any form in any place, can be found when looking in the mirror, is used in all sorts of ways to facilitate logic and frequently keeps us on the edge of our seats in our desire to experience it. In fact, the definition of that implement is so extensive and colorful that it would need its own series of books in order to hold all of its details. As we pass between what we think about ourselves and how all of it feels, what is the instrument that has been missing from our process that holds the possibility of our being a little more unstoppable even with detours, weeds and falls along our trails? During Ryan’s substance use years, I had a lot of perceived thoughts on his addiction as well as how if he would just do as I say and stop using, everything would be all right. The longer that didn’t happen, the more determined I was to prove that it was literally that simple. I was in essence fixated on that particular thought which when battling things such as fire-breathing dragons is really like throwing a cup of water at it while expecting not to get burned and yet I repeated that for years despite what continued to be replicated. I believe that when we are in that kind of fear-invoking place, or any type for that matter, it becomes easier and easier to be caught between what we think we know, a finished product, and the emotions that help feed the hell. Over time, then, what we have established in ourselves roots us in a pattern that is more likely to ensure that the view on our rides will stay the same and the change we want will be fleeting. So, if our knowledge about ourselves or others and what needs to be done becomes defined by the dreaded “f” word known as fixed, we are leaving out the instrument that turns impossible into “I’m possible” which is the very tool that characters in epic tales’ use. Our critique of ourselves comes from turning around and viewing what has already been with the assumption that we will continue on as we are familiar with. That’s a place on the inside that those personas can’t stay in if they are going to defeat mystical creatures and in our excitement of their narratives, we don’t actually perceive of that movement. Ryan never envisioned becoming an addict nor did I and the length of our time together in that position was in part because we were both established in our thoughts about it as well as ourselves. We wanted out of that hell, but we never actually imagined what that would look like other than to have the goal of his no longer using substances as well as the hope that he would never again. Of course, it is difficult to visualize that as a part of our series of movements, imagination is a key to not only holding on but to transforming a mess. As I turn around and look at the yesterdays, I can see how change has always been enfolding me in ways that I love as well as ones that I hate but together all of it is a part of my work of art in progress that is only limited when I forget to imagine what else is possible along my journey. Stay curious about yourself as you become aware of what has been established in you and then leave room to imagine you as so much more. After all, characters in epic tales are the imagination of writers who always envision those personas going through and you are the creator of your story where you get to imagine climbing emotional cliffs, traversing through the weeds, picking flowers, throwing your hands in the air on your ride as well as slaying your kind of dragons despite those established details of your life. Have the best day POSSIBLE for you as you perceive that fixed becomes a dreaded “f” word, a prickle of sorts, if it encourages you to believe that yesterday’s moments have already established tomorrows before you have even gotten there. Love Always, Heavell
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