There is a lot of discomfort that lives in our darkness and it has a way of turning our experiences that have wrapped up our hearts into the predictableness that our minds continue to seek.
Even the two forces of sunny days and a thing called hope can’t completely silence the art of that pain and grief as it weaves through us and we build our existence around the marks that can only be felt.
The things that we don’t want to talk about continue to be attached to us no matter how much we like to pretend that they are not there and that makes the yesterdays feel like they are leveraged against us as we hold onto the view of them.
We even think that happiness is something out of a dream because our limited definition of it implies the absence of suffering and based on the fact that we do hurt, we then also mistakenly carry the belief that finding our joy will never be while still pursuing it with our hope along for the ride.
The details of our personal stories are what we engage with on the inside even when we are smiling on the outside so attempting to quiet certain parts of ourselves is similar to blocking our own light and then wondering why we are never the ones with the ecosystems that grow the flowers that seem to effortlessly flourish on the trails of others.
The change that we want to happen isn’t propped up with the certainty that we desire nor is it a single event that will erase what has been written in black and white in our hearts but it is the process of learning the different ways that we exist in the rhythms of our energetic emotions that sing the weakest moments of our lives so very loudly.
Sometimes we are the dragons that cause our own suffering as we imply in our hearts and minds that we don’t want any of ourselves in our attempts to turn away from and discard the blah that resides within us.
The full value of being happy comes from showing up in the difficulties as many times as it takes, so if we truly want to let go of what we have been enduring, then we have to repurpose the materials that make us authentically who we are.
This is you and this is me but the aches that are whispered beneath our breaths are what separate us into our unique stories so a simple step forward is to become familiar with your specific color of love and practice using that to encircle all of your experiences with its hug.
The beauty that you have been looking for is waiting to meet you and its not around the bend nor only seen on the days that you are able to laugh because it occupies the established individual garden that exists within you whether the sun is shining or not or you are laying down from the pain of your weeds.
Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
Beyond our minds are our hearts that are filled with the moving emotional energy that is our authenticity and our thoughts believe that if we restrict the vibes of our unwanted feels and subsequently the responses that they generate, it will help us to be happy but in that quest to repress , we are also unknowingly limiting the possibilities of our showing up for ourselves.
Our idea is that by hindering those voices we have some sort of control but those out of tune rhythms continue to have the ability to keep us swaying on the edge where even the smallest gust from our storms can unwrap what we have tried so hard to contain.
Sometimes we are the dragons that hold us captive and the ones who cast the fear-invoking shadows that we see up ahead while in other moments, the debris that we ourselves carry causes us to stumble but we think it’s because the sun isn’t shining on our trails.
We imagine that success is the results of everything being just right but the real truth is that the first step of achievement is in allowing ourselves to experience unhappy feelings and to make mistakes as we slowly navigate the untested pathways on our journeys.
We can’t rush the process and while it may feel like we are repeating what has already been as we try and try again, each time it is ever so slightly different because we have added to ourselves despite the consistency of our glimpses of the yesterdays.
Wandering closer to our emotions and going through them grows the love that we need for ourselves even though our fear of what lurks in the darkness there would have us believe that we are unlovable because of it’s existence or the possibility that it does.
We can’t do everything at once but what we can start with is changing or interrupting our understanding of the weather in our lives and recognizing that showing up is a shield that is meant for an ordinary day as well as the cloudiest of ones because finding our joy isn’t just about celebrating the flowers.
So, if we are going to fall, then let’s choose our how and why we do so, so that it is our choice to move and not our reactionary steps to the constant grief and distress that exists around us in the tunes of small things and big items.
Forgiveness is an action word as much as love is and to be successful with each, we have to expand who we are by turning on our lights in the darkness instead of trying to restrict the authenticity that powers those beams.
Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
Its hard to imagine that our collection of stacked items could ever be cause for celebration but then its also challenging to recognize that included within them is the proof that we do know how to do things.
Often what we notice about our weight of the world is the vulnerability of our having been authentic and that particular knowledge repeatedly predicts what will still be regardless of any change of location or hope that we may have.
Our idea of and need for things to be just right implies that we are stuck within a certain capacity because of what has already been and showing up for ourselves is so very difficult when we are surrounded by constant negativity that feels like the reminders of why we shouldn’t.
Even though we may have things memorized about ourselves, it’s good to break apart the layers and ask better questions to deepen our understanding of the potential that also lives within the moments that we don’t want.
So, how have you been dealing with the stress and uncertainty found on even an ordinary day in your life?
Whatever that answer is, its still you trying which in a different but very real truth is a small flower within the weeds of practicing in a so very heavell life.
How close we are to the dragons that reside in us determines the strength of the feels in those parts and surprisingly, sometimes those mystical beasts are hoping to be rescued by us despite our believing that we are the ones in need of being freed from them.
Words are like seeds that grow in both darkness and light and for every gloomy term that we have written in our stories or muddied color that we have cast upon a canvas, there is also the verification of some sort of an ability hidden inside as well.
Look at it this way, the more secure we feel within ourselves as sometime warriors who are capable of falling down as well as finding the sun on the days that we are the ones casting the shadows, the easier it becomes for us to reshape ourselves as we encounter the untested steps of our journeys in the tomorrows.
Step back and celebrate the contents of the smiles, the tears and the dragons as the colorful evidence that you do know how to do things even on an ordinary day like today.
Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
The uneasiness of the yesterdays can be found in the emotions of the powerlessness of today as if the memories of before are slowly permeating through the sheets that have yet to be written on.
It’s as if our details have become muddied by the visual language of our being put together with only the unwanted when really we encompass the highs and the lows of everything that we can do.
That feeling of darkness in our hearts is a part of the reason why we feel disconnected from happiness but just like beauty, joy isn’t solely present in the light nor is being possible exclusive to walks in the sunshine.
Our colors and words are what wrap us up in our authenticity and when we focus on our weeds, we aren’t leaving room for us to be curious about the sparks of novel movement we’ve had along the way as well.
Our losses imply we never fought to begin with but to get to where we want we have to endure the starts, the restarts and the debris as many times as it takes while strength slowly and quietly trickles through all of it.
Accepting the versions that we have been can replenish what we believe is missing through the understanding that what we do next isn’t about forgetting the yesterdays but it is about forgiving the moments because it is still us within them.
That kindness is what the readers of our narratives notice even when there isn’t a single sentence or hue that directly expresses it and its also why they turn the page with the hope that we as the main characters will eventually discover that magical key as well.
Here’s some flowers for you in the form of the knowledge that you don’t have to fix the smiles and tears that live in your story but you do have to allow love to encircle what’s there which means reshaping your belief that celebrations are for when you are happy.
Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
Our thoughts repeat the same story over and over while our hearts play the same emotions leaving little room for us to step back and view our narratives as readers instead of as we do as the writers of them.
Authors need all of their somethings to express their journeys, especially the sound of darkness and of course the dragons, but when an account is read, things get colorful through all of the lines not just some of the words.
The truth of each of our stories lives on both sides as well as in the middle and that along with the whole cast of characters that are engaged with our flow affects what passes through or keeps us in the midst of it.
So, how would you introduce yourself in your rendering?
Are you inclined to portray yourself as the villain, the sometime warrior who falls down, the person in need of the sun or are you willing to let the readers figure it out knowing that some will place you in the wrong category while others will move you around as they turn the pages?
What, then, would an outsider take the time to notice because we are always aware of the lows in our stories and yet we can’t seem to remember to value the other kinds of marks on us as well?
We tend to relive our backstories through the same comfortable feels and although we hope to find happiness around each bend, our familiar way of being continues to define our ability to be content on the sheets that are still waiting for us to put ourselves out there without worrying about the weather.
There is a difference between writing and reading a story just as there is a contrast in distracting ourselves from unhappiness and actually being happy.
So here’s some flowers for you.
Black and white portrayals may appear to be the right stuff in what we communicate to ourselves but they don’t allow for the light to shine all around us nor do they help us to discover how we will succeed in our so very colorful worlds.
So give ground to the storms as well as the search for the sun and take time to see yourself in the way a reader would allow you to just be you in each and every feel that happens within your pages.
Have the best day POSSIBLE for you. Love Always, Heavell
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