How has it felt to look on the outside of yourself for the relief from what hurts on the inside of you? Were you aware that seeking comfort in that place would mean you would remain uncomfortable on the inside; whether an addict or not? That it would require more and more just to attempt to feel the original solace that attracted you to begin with? Or how about the real truth that as it became the loudest part of you, the rest of you would be pushed into the shadows? Difficulties will always be a part of our lives because there’s no way to get around them. If you are uncomfortable with adversity, whether on the inside or the outside, then seeking assistance is an acceptance of who you are; a delving into the view beyond just what you are able to see. It is actually a strength when it’s used to help yourself go through; but not when it’s used to feed the hell. Turn around and look at the yesterdays. Step inside to where those moments will show you all the ways in which you have descended; even if not always into hell. Falls, whether in words, feelings or behaviors, have always held the hope for the discovery of understanding and change; the actual possibility of transforming hell into superpowers. As you are, if you are scared, then just say you are. Do this for you because while help can be found on the outside, you have always been the one who was meant to go through on this journey. As the beholder of heaven as well as the bringer of hell, you are the most important person at your position. Here’s to this so very heavell life where sometime warriors fall right along with illusions of perfection. Oh hell, who has some tissues for the green truths, the pain, the “f” moments and for the fabulous times that make us laugh so hard we cry? I will just wait right here, in this perfect moment, for you to consent to showing up for you.

One of the strongest feelings that we each experience is that of being alone; or at least the fear of being so. What have you chained to the definition of that word to make it your own? Even when we are in a room full of people, those who are on the outside of us, we can still feel that way on the inside. Despite the differences that are found amongst us, we all share similarities when the pain of isolation and loneliness is breathed into our hearts. Both fear and sadness accept and love everyone equally but it’s what we each do with it that determines its’ affect. After all, a feeling is still a feeling no matter who holds it nor how it came to be. If you understand that particular place in hell, what is in your words that can help or has helped you? Can you use your pain to perceive of what others are going through now; that view beyond what is just in front you? To assist them so that they may have hope while on their trail? The art of living in heavell is recognizing that what we imagine is not there, is actually there in some part or place for each of us; despite not being easily understood. It matters not if you are a princess, a student, a jock, a mother, an addict, an illusion of perfection or anyone else because we are all “f” moment makers and feelers; as the beholders of heaven and the bringers of hell. Turn around and get comfortably uncomfortable with your parts, moments, words and feelings; just don’t stay there too long. As a sometime warrior, what’s not there is the ability to be one without pain. Assist yourself by accepting the yesterdays and step towards the tomorrows where the anything and the everything can be different for you; but will still hurt in any given moment. Together and not together we are the beauty, the fear, the loneliness and so much more. Here’s to creating superpowers and or falls from the adversities; because change lives in both. As the heavell keeper of your life, all of this has always been for the perfect person; in other words for you.