Where Will You be Tomorrow? #252

Do you think that you would have acted differently in your life if the process of “living through your feelings” entailed only what can be found on an easy trail where the sun is always shining, and blooms are in abundance and there are no rocks to trip you? Or what if the feelings that occupy you were the results of battles with mystical creatures? Would they be acceptable then? What if those familiar feelings that live so loudly in you still found a way to come together even if the events and backdrop were changed on your journey? How would you feel about that? About you? Life would certainly feel easier if the things along our rides didn’t forge who we are but then we are not living as bland expressionless walk-ons in a story who move through emotionally charged moments without feeling them. Perhaps the problem is that it sounds so much more interesting to talk about a fire-breathing dragon that is determined to prevent you from reaching your goal then it is to say that your feelings, which have burning super-powers too, have you walking in circles and unable to commit to moving forth? Or maybe it’s that you never envisioned this BLAH as a part of your life so now you don’t feel safe enough going through with you as the writer? Of course, it could also be that after stumbling and falling enough times that it feels like the power of hope is an insufficient tool when facing the kinds of weeds that can move even on a calm day. It’s the touch in our hearts of those kinds of personal feelings that makes us who we are as individuals. In other words, being authentic means, the feelings that we know inhabit us and that includes the ones we don’t want. A change of location to a flat, debris-free trail where we can stop to sit in fields of flowers, then, would certainly appear to be the better choice to stroll on but the truth is that we can’t really see the thorns on those blooms or what is waiting around the bend to pounce upon us which is what our lives are really like no matter what we think we perceive is on another trail. We can even do everything right and still have it all go horribly wrong because this is life, and we live it. An extended family member was happily on a sun-filled journey that he loved when he was tragically killed three weeks ago at the age of 23. That person was Ryan’s younger brother and the remaining son of a father as well as the last brother of three sisters and the only son of a mother. The loss of that one person will bring unfathomable pain to the trails of many even if they were on what looked like the better path or don’t want to be pierced by the thousands of thorns found in the anguish of loss. By each of us being an original, we hold a contradiction of feelings that continually enfold us in a little and a lot of ways that often leave us painfully unsure of ourselves as well as life. Every day, though, we get to decide what we are going to say to ourselves even when we are thinking about what we could have done differently in the yesterdays, or we wish we could change our backdrops. So where will you be tomorrow in your heart? Will you write about what inhabits you and will that include a story of love for yourself in the exact setting that you are “living through your feelings” now? It is, after all your better story. Have the best day POSSIBLE as an original. Love Always, Heavell